Why do these things only seem to happen to you?

Are some people born with a particular magnetism for ridiculous or unfortunate circumstances? How are there certain individuals who manage to attract situations that others almost never find themselves in? Is there a certain clashing of chromosomes, life lessons that were never taught, an aversion to a green vegetable that contains a special vitamin that possesses us with the ability to join the dots?

This is not to say it's a negative trait, though you can't really classify it as something you wished you were capable of. Each time such a situation arises, I remain unconvinced that surely, no, not really? This can't really happen - too many variables all leaning in one direction, normally it's only one or another. The dominoes topple over in a heap and never fit back in the box on the first go.

Here is a compiled list that I thought of because it was a type of evening that was too hot for a doona but too cold for a sheet; and also because being here leads to remaniscence of types, bringing all of it back again.

1. Dislocated knee in the middle of service at Jolleys Boathouse Restaurant, complete with being carried outside by two patrons, vomiting in a wine cooler and being zipped to the Royal Adelaide still wearing my apron.
2. Neville.
3. The events prior and following the midnight October swim in Nitschke's unchlorinated pool in 2006.
4. Missing the metro in Paris in the wee hours of the morning - my companions managed to get on alright, I just struggled a little with the motor skills needed to do the same.
5. Catching a cab from Brussels to Amsterdam with two strangers.
6. In the same weekend, getting lost in Amsterdam whilst clutching my broken suitcase (tied it together with a belt, innovative, no?) and being convinced I could hear Dutch men talking about how much I would like anal sex.
7. Shredding half my knee avoiding a 'car' that was roaring down a street near Daniel's house.
8. With the aforemention scab still fresh, got my shoe stuck in an escalator at Target, managed to fall over (not delicately, amidst the Christmas shoppers) henceforth breaking open the scab and bleeding through my work pants ('What can I get for you today? A nice bloody coffee?')
9. Having an allergic reaction to sunscreen the week before starting highschool. Year 8 kicked off with a bang, me looking like a half-cooked, pimply, pink marshmallow.


This is the shortlisted version - I'm a unique individual. Though I'm starting to see the validity in Mum saying things like - 'You'll be lucky to reach your twentieth birthday.'